When a show kills off two of its main characters in any given week, expectations are bound to be high for finale episodes. And while “The Walking Dead” mid-season finale, which aired Sunday evening, had its share of action, the action was poorly presented.
At the episode’s opening, Glen and Maggie were still being held captive at the makeshift town of Woodbury. Proving once again that he is a genius under pressure, Glenn ripped the arm off a dead walker. He snapped the bone and extracted it to use as a crude weapon should they have the opportunity to escape. The bone was sharp, but it seemed too thin to hold up against men with axes.
He really should have tried for the femur, since that’s the hardest bone in the human body. I think. My sources of medical info are the brilliant minds at Yahoo Answers and whatever I pick up during reruns of “House.”
Anyway, Michonne led Rick, Daryl and O-Dog (the new T-Dog) into Woodbury on a highly dangerous rescue mission. The search built tension, but the show’s momentum was tempered when the focus kept switching back to the prison, where only boring, mildly creepy things were happening.
Axel hit on 17-year-old Beth while she was holding baby Judith – a name more fitting for a middle-aged elementary school teacher than a newborn.
Carol told him off. Axel explained that he was in the slammer for a long time, and he can’t go after Maggie because she’s with Glenn, and he can’t try for Carol’s affection because she’s a lesbian…
Oh, wait. Carol’s not a lesbian? Axel just assumed she was, since she has short hair.
He really was in jail for a while. In fact, he must have gone in before Halle Berry arrived on the Hollywood scene. And Michelle Williams. And Emma Watson, Natalie Portman, Victoria Beckham, Anne Hathaway…any of the dozens of well-known and undeniably beautiful straight women who have worn the pixie cut quite well.
By the way, why is Carol the only one with the sense to keep her hair cropped? First of all, it’s safer. A walker could reach out and grab a ponytail, just like any other attacker. It’s also more easily maintained in a world where showers are few and far between.
She must be hiding her scissors from Carl, whose greasy mop continues to grow past his ears.
For maybe the first time since the show’s inception, Carl’s existence wasn’t totally detrimental. By saving the newcomers, he ensured that a few fresh faces will be around in the next half of the season. Given how long we’ve followed “Team Rick” and how rapidly the show’s writers hand characters’ lives over to walkers, new people will be a welcome addition.
But Carl is notorious for finding trouble and leading it right home, so these strangers will probably end up killing Daryl or some other beloved member of the cast.
Even the scenes in Woodbury were a tad disappointing – lots of gunfire obstructed by smoke bombs. The action was so difficult to see, viewers may as well have been closing their eyes. Is AMC facing budget cuts?
The group only lost O-Dog, because the producers seem to stipulate that only one black man can be on the show at a time. Is this a call to its southern setting? The new guy’s new is Tyrese, so we can’t call him T-Dog, too. Maybe T-Dog 2? Two-Dog?
Luckily we have until February to figure it out.
