Shutdown parody of Gannon’s government

Tuesday was the first day of the U.S. government shutdown. While this may not be news, many people – particularly students – do not necessarily understand what this means. For the sake of explaining this shutdown in a fun way, let’s bring the shutdown closer to home.

Let’s imagine the possibility of an administrative shutdown at Gannon. Here is how it would go down.

University administrators would have proposed a medical plan that changes the way student insurance is being handled. The Board of Trustees, however, wouldn’t agree on it and decide not to fund the university.   They decide to shut down most administrative functions on campus, to put it in simple terms.

While Campus Police and Safety personnel – who protect campus security – and Human Resources employees – who send out checks – will remain operative, the shutdown will affect several entities within Gannon.

The student health services at Gannon would no longer accept new patients.

The Office of Residence Life would no longer provide local housing to students.

The Human Resources Office would not be able to check on the immigration status of prospective foreign employees on campus.

Resident assistants and counselors – the closest equivalent of the justice system – would suspend many student “civil” cases.

Friendship Green (parks)  and the Schuster Art Gallery (museums)  on campus would be closed and would no longer be accessible to students and faculty.

The International Student and International Admissions offices would no longer be able to process I-20s and visa applications to incoming international students.

Other institutions on campus would also be closed because of this shutdown.

The U.S. government shutdown is, of course, a lot more extensive than the above-mentioned parallels on campus.

The perceived effects of this imaginary shutdown on Gannon are significantly magnified in the real ongoing government shutdown.